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The Real-Deal Bridal Bible: The Ultimate Wedding Planner to Help You Blush Like a Bride and Plan Like a Bitch, by Alessandra Macaluso
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If you are planning a wedding you'll ask yourself obvious questions, like where would I like to get married? What dress will I wear? And, where should we honeymoon? But unexpected little buggers will also pop up, such as: Why is my bestie acting like she swallowed four Xanax and washed them down with three mimosas? Why does my mom’s face twitch like that when I talk reception ideas? How come everyone shares opinions, without me asking? And, upon finding yourself locked in a closet: What are the going rates for a room for two at the Little White Wedding Chapel in Vegas? Planning a wedding can be a wonderful time in your life, but it can also be overwhelming. And the whole process has a funny way of bringing out the crazy in everyone around you. The Real-Deal Bridal Bible will prepare you for everything you need to know -- the REAL things -- so you can plan the wedding that best reflects you while keeping your sanity, finances, and relationships intact. Whether you are thinking about marriage, are engaged, or are well past your wedding, you will find entertainment and advice in this book which you can use long after the last dance. "How I wish I'd had this book to save me back when I got married!! It's the perfect survival guide for not going insane while planning a wedding!" - Jill Smokler, New York Times Bestselling author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy "When you're ready for the marriage but fear the drama of planning a wedding, do yourself a favor and read this book. And make sure you stockpile it and do the newly-betrothed in your life a favor by making it their very first engagement gift." - Kim Bongiorno, New York Times Bestselling author, married since 2003 "A warm, funny, engaging, and comprehensive guide to planning your big day. This book focuses on all aspects of the event, and also includes intelligent and insightful commentary about the relationship that the wedding will celebrate. Buy for yourself, your sister, your friend, or, if you want to be the cool mother-in-law, for your son's fiance." - Samantha Rodman, Ph.D, founder of DrPsychMom.com and author of How to Talk to Your Kids About Divorce
- Sales Rank: #790534 in Books
- Published on: 2015-07-15
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .61" w x 6.00" l, .81 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 270 pages
About the Author
Alessandra Macaluso is a recovering bride who has been clean for about 4 years now. She is a freelance writer and creator at heart. An avid writer of screenplays, articles, and business/product reviews, she has contributed to Uptown Magazine, Charlotte Magazine, My Carolina Town Magazine, and Yelp.com, among other publications, and was featured in the New York Times “Life and Style” section. Her original screenplay, “Polar Suburbia”, placed as a semi-finalist in the 2009 Moondance Film Festival. To learn more about Alessandra you can visit her blog at: www.punkwife.com
Most helpful customer reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
The most useful bridal book you will buy
By elizabeth Painkin
I am married but I bought this book for my soon to be sister in law and decided to give it a read. Wow. I wish I had this book when I was planning my wedding. Alessandra's personal experiences and input from other brides, is truly relatable, hilarious, raw and touching. What a mix just like the emotions that almost every bride has had at one point during this wonderfully crazy journey to love. I highly recommend this read to all those brides to be and newlyweds!
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Are you a bride-to-be? Read this book first!
By E. Krahn
Part of my continuing education program as a wedding planner includes keeping up with the latest wedding inspiration blogs and planning books. When I came across Alessandra Macaluso’s “Bitch’s Bridal Bible,” I had no idea what to expect, given the title. First off, I was unsure of the target audience – was this a read for the unapologetic bridezilla, or a guide on how not to become one? Needless to say, I was intrigued and quickly bought the Kindle version. I soon found out that the book is about the craziness of wedding planning…and a whole lot more!
Alessandra (Ali) does a fantastic job of describing and identifying the proverbial characters and situations that certainly every bride encounters along the wedding-planning journey. At the same time, she provides the reader with a slew of wedding planning tips, as well as real-world advice designed to help any bride be better prepared for her new life.
The book is cleverly organized in “Tables” (like the ones you will have at your reception venue, not literally, but you get the point), which provide a “floor plan” of common situations you will encounter as soon as you have that sparkling ring on your finger. One of my favorite Tables is #2, the “Pre-Planning Checklist.” According to Ali, “While no one wants to invite Debbie Downer to the wedding, I wouldn’t be able to present this book to you in its most complete, honest form without saving her a seat this table.” Another highlight of the book is “The Tough Questions” section, which delves into the fundamental issue of whether you and your fiancee are truly made for each other.
For her book, Ali interviewed various experts in relationships, including marriage counselors, therapists, and mediators, whose must-have pearls of wisdom are perfectly sprinkled throughout. Ali also passes along personal stories of her own wedding-planning ride – many of which are a hoot! – as well as the experiences of other couples. Topics such as wedding mishaps, relationships with in-laws, and sudden jealous friends will keep you turning the pages with lightning pace (oh, you’re going to love “Narcy Darcy”).
For those of who may (and probably will at some point!) find themselves stressed and struggling to deal with people’s antics and not so well intended comments, Ali’s advice is simple: “Every moment you spend getting annoyed or being upset over something someone else has done or said is a precious moment being taken away from your wedding, your life and your happiness.” Amen, sister!
From a wedding planner perspective, this book is about so much more than the logistical decisions and choices facing the bride-to-be. Yes, there are helpful and practical tips on preparing for your big day, but Ali reminds the reader that a wedding is over in a few hours, but a marriage is intended to last a lifetime!
If you’re a bride-to-be or think you might be at some point down the road, give yourself the “Bitch’s Bridal Bible.” Need a gift for your newly engaged girlfriend? Present her with Ali’s book and know that she’ll laugh her bottom-off at times, and at others, she will give some serious thought to the business of getting married. In the end, she’ll know you care for her.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Sassy, Savvy, Humorous, and Honest
By Veronica Ibarra
Even in our progressive American society weddings are still a big deal to many women. Whether you are a blushing bride or a bridezilla there is a massive amount of work to do in preparation, and not all of it has to do with the actual wedding. There are some things you should think about before committing to a partner. The Bitch's Bridal Bible is the bridal book that covers everything from before to after "I do."
If you did not get it from the title of the book, you should know that this bridal book does not hold anything back. This is not a candy coated version of how to prepare for happily ever after. This is a book for real brides who want to know the real deal about choosing the right groom, planning the right wedding and honeymoon, and what to expect from "till death do you part."
Macaluso is candid in her delivery as she talks about her experience and shares those of others she has gathered along the way. This book offers a dose of reality were reality is needed without sucking all the joy out of the process. In fact, Macalusco talks about how to enjoy the moments as they come and offers useful tips on how to manage the inevitable stress of getting married, whether it is forcing brides to reevaluate their attitudes or providing some direction in dealing with friends and family who may have lost perspective of whose wedding it really is.
The Bitch's Bridal Bible is full of personal perspectives, and professional advice. But like any really good reference book it covers the bases while allowing the reader to figure out exactly which parts they can use and what applies to them with a heaping dose of humor.
This is the bridal book I wish had been around when I was engaged. I had a few that were helpful, but Macaluso speaks my language with her sassy, savvy approach. She hits on some of the things that no one really talks about, like how much work there is and some of the less attractive parts of being with someone every day and night. It is not all sunshine and roses, and though you may intellectually understand this, it is all too easy to become disillusioned if you don't attempt to face these aspects of reality before they slap you in the face.
I would recommend this book to any bride-to-be or even any bride-thinking-to-be. It might also be fun for all the bride's-that-have-been. I know I laughed out loud at several points, mostly because I knew exactly what Macaluso was talking about having been there and seen it myself. Some brides prefer a straight up list for easy check off, while others might prefer to have their hand held throughout the entire process. This book offers both with practical and humorous information no matter what kind of wedding you are planning.
(Originally published at VeronicaMonique.com)
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